The Only Way?
by Keirou
Summary: Eric finds the one way to cure Shi no Toge...but at what cost?


It was fairly dark in the library, the only sign of any presence a single reading lamp that was illuminating one of the large tables tucked away amongst the shelves. The table's surface was already covered with several large books and many scraps of paper upon which notes had been hastily written. Their author seemed to be missing, though an observer who continued watching for a few moments longer would see him step out from the shelves with several more volumes in his arms. These joined the others already on the table and the man sat down to begin reading with an air of almost desperate determination.

Eric Slingby had been in the library for most of that day, reading anything and everything that even remotely had to do with the only ailment that ever truly affected a shinigami. Ordinarily immortal, there was still one solitary thing that could end what was otherwise an eternal life; Shi no Toge, the Thorns of Death. It was a slow, painful, lingering way to go, and its exact cause was still unknown. Eric had already read everything he could find on the medical aspects of the disease when he'd first discovered that his partner Alan had somehow contracted it, trying to find some way to end it and restore his close friend to full health.

There hadn't been anything.

Alan tried to let on that the disease didn't bother him, often pushing himself to his limits or beyond in an attempt to not let it get the better of him. Eric had never told him, but he admired that spirit. He didn't want to see it get snuffed out, and especially not in such a manner. From everything the older shinigami had been able to discover, Shi no Toge drove its namesake thorns – whether literally or metaphorically – deeper into its victim, taking its time, until they finally pierced the heart and ended the life that had been marked. And every time the thorns drove deeper, it was accompanied by pain that ranged from moderate to completely incapacitating.

This last Eric had observed just on his own, watching Alan's struggle with the disease. Occasionally the younger man could make it through an attack with only an expression of pain on his otherwise gentle and handsome face, but there were numerous occasions when Eric had had to carry him to the infirmary racked with pain through his chest. On those days, Eric's determination to find a way to end the disease and cure his partner doubled at the least.

Just yesterday had been such a day, which was why he had spent the entirety of what had been his day off in the library, tracking down every single lead he could find even down to old legends and fairy tales. So far there had been no luck at all, but he couldn't stop. Memories kept flashing across his mind's eye: Alan's face, trying to hide exactly how much pain he was in even as he leaned against Eric for support; the pallor in his cheeks as he slept, forehead covered with a faint sheen of sweat; the fear of death in Alan's eyes during every single attack.

It was this last that truly drove Eric, kept him researching even though every single trail was turning up cold. He couldn't lose his partner, the one he was closest to in the entire organization. Eric seldom opened up to anyone, preferring to remain aloof and make comments from the sidelines even during the office parties he frequented, but Alan just had a way about him that drew people in; when they'd ended up partners it hadn't taken very long for Alan to understand Eric's solitary ways, to accept them rather than be pushed away by them, and a close friendship had quickly grown between them.

Eric pushed the book he was currently reading aside and leaned back in the chair, rubbing one hand over his eyes. He was tired and frustrated, backed into a corner with no apparent way out. Even amongst the legends and myths there had been no mention of a cure for Shi no Toge...was there no hope at all then?

No. He couldn't accept that. There had to be a way. He had once thought there was no cure for the plague, had lost someone close to him from it and had fallen to it himself afterward, but one had eventually been found. Perhaps it had been long after his original time, but one had been found nonetheless. There _had_ to be a way, and he had to find it, for Alan's sake. Reaching out blindly, Eric grabbed another book from the new pile and started flipping through the pages, scanning for anything remotely hopeful. When that book turned up nothing he pulled out another, and another, and still another, each one getting shoved aside as it proved unhelpful. Would he have to stop for the day and try again tomorrow? It was starting to look that way, but then a line in the second-to-last book caught his eye.

_...end Shi no Toge's grip_

Eric felt an almost electric thrill run through him as he bent over the volume. This was it. It may be a book of mere legends, but legends had a basis in fact, didn't they? A chance was a chance, no matter how small. After a few moments he realized he'd missed the first half of the tale and flipped back a page to read it fully, heart racing and hand shaking as he reached for the pen he'd been using to take notes. The rising hope, however, soon turned into the chill of shock and horror as he realized what the legend was saying.

There was a cure. But its cost was perhaps worse than the disease itself.

He stared at the words on the page, eyes wide. Innocent souls, the best being young women and children, taken before their time. One thousand of them. If one could collect that many, stain their soul that badly, only then could the curse of Shi no Toge be lifted. This was not the way he'd been hoping for. Perhaps it had been fanciful, a flight of the imagination, but he'd hoped that perhaps there was some elixir that could be made, or some ointment or medicine that could be found to end the disease. But this...

Hand shaking still, he mechanically wrote the details down then shoved the notepaper away. It was still a way, even though it was horrifying and would carry a death sentence with it if anyone ever found out. Then he grabbed the last book and started feverishly flipping through its pages. Was there another option? Surely there had to be...surely fate wasn't so cruel as to leave Alan's only option something that would stain his soul blacker than a demon's.

There wasn't. In his heart Eric knew that. If there had been any other way, he surely would have stumbled across it by now, as much time and effort as he'd put into it, and all his efforts had turned up nothing.

Nothing but outright murder.

The shinigami sat back in his chair, staring at the paper on which he had written the basic details of the legend. A full thousand pure, innocent souls, collected by a death scythe, to cure the only thing outside of a death scythe that could kill a shinigami...he shut his eyes, feeling the threatening prickle of tears start in them, and slammed the last book shut. How was he supposed to tell Alan? His partner who somehow empathized with the dead they were sent to collect on routine?

He couldn't.

But he couldn't just throw away that paper, either. Eric opened his eyes to stare at it for a long moment before folding it and tucking it away in a pocket. It was Alan's only hope, though there was always still the admittedly naïve hope that perhaps the disease would lessen on its own with the treatment Alan was undergoing, pass through and leave him alive. It was all Eric had to cling to, and he found himself doing so with more desperation than usual. He had to, because his other option...

His other option was murder.


End file.
